This whole “Grand Theft Auto” thing really got to me yesterday. I played guitar at church, but stunk up the joint with wrong chords. During the sermon, I couldn’t focus on anything the pastor said. I was still mad.
As the day wore on and gave way to night, anger began to morph into fear: fear that they would come back, fear that I was forgetting something that had an important number on it in the car (social security number, checking account, credit card), fear that they would try the house next. Last night, I didn’t sleep worth a crap. Every noise, everytime Rusty barked (thinking he was finally doing his job), every car door that slammed brought me out of semi-sleep and to my feet to check out what was going on. I think I was having a crash-course in OCD.
When I got up this morning, I was not only tired physically, but mentally and spiritually. Sunday is usually a day of joy for me, and getting to play guitar during worship is a huge blessing, yet I felt as if I’d been drug through the mud. I felt violated, if that makes sense. I felt cheated. How could someone do this to me? To ME?!!!
I turned to the only place I know to turn when I get like this: the Bible. I’m going through the book of Psalms right now, and this morning I “happened” to read this:
“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore, we will not fear, even though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea” Psalm 46:1
Reading that Psalm was like God shook me awake with a bucket of cold water. What was I afraid of? Some punk kid? These people can take my possessions, but they can’t take the most important thing of all: my place in Christ! He is my refuge and my strength! I realized that I had been trying to handle this on my own, to make sense of it on my own, to reconcile my mind to it. Why? What does it matter? Focus on the One Who is above it all: Jesus.
I realize that this whole thing is a really small thing in the great grand scheme of things (think I could say “thing” anymore in one sentence?), but it has really affected me. God promises that He will cause “all things to work for good to them that love God and are the called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28) I believe He’s doing that with this. Heck, I even prayed for the guy that did it today. I prayed that he’ll listen to some of the stuff on the mp3 player he took, because it was loaded with praise songs and sermons! Maybe God will change his heart through what he stole! Wouldn’t that be a hoot?
Hey, all things are possible with God!