Okay, I guess 10 days was long enough. I’ve figured out that I can type by undoing the wrist cuff on my sling and laying the keyboard in my lap. I’m hurting like the dickens right now, so this is going to be short and sweet.
Count your blessings. I’m learning this truth more and more each day. Nothing like losing the use of your right arm to make you appreciate so many things. Like typing this thing, for instance. I didn’t realize how much I enjoy this. But, more importantly, putting my little girl in her crib. Picking her up and throwing her in the air. Hugging her with a big bear hug. Man, do I miss that.
Or rolling over and putting my arm around Amanda in the middle of the night. Or rolling over, for that matter.
Or driving. I will never make fun of an older person who doesn’t want to give up their keys again. Because I never realized how much freedom is associated with the ability to drive. When you can’t, and you’re suddenly dependent on everyone else…not easy. Especially for a man.
And I know a few of my family members will find this hard to believe, but I hate the fact that Amanda is having to do everything around her. Seriously. I feel like a freaking deadbeat dad, because I can’t even fold the laundry. Or wash dishes. She’s been amazing, because she hasn’t complained once, but I feel like a worthless slug.
No comments from the peanut gallery on that last line.
In all of this, I’m trying to hold to what a pastor told me this week: “take this time and allow Amanda to minister to you.” That’s not easy for a man. Well, for me, anyway.
I’m also trying to realize what the Lord is wanting to tell me in all this. I’ve been spending a lot of time in Hebrews 12:5-13 and Psalm 119. That’s an awesome Psalm, in it’s entirety, but particularly verse 67:
“Before I was afflicted, I went astray, but now I keep Your Word.”
The Lord has been dealing with me that maybe I’ve been more concerned with serving Him than with knowing Him, spending time with Him. And just maybe I’ve allowed public ministry to take the place of my primary ministry, to Amanda and Caroline.
Ok, so maybe it won’t be that short after all. Just some thoughts to let you know what’s up at the Perch.
Grace and Peace